


i'm not ready to go

by ThatsCrazyRandom



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, How Do I Tag, I Made Myself Cry, M/M, Major character death - Freeform, unedited
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-24
Updated: 2018-02-24
Packaged: 2019-03-23 09:29:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13784613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatsCrazyRandom/pseuds/ThatsCrazyRandom
Summary: Stucky angst based on Kiss It All Better by He Is We





	i'm not ready to go

**Author's Note:**

> [Kiss It All Better by He is We](https://youtu.be/MqOEuZDOsTg)

Life Imprisonment.  He was in here for the rest of his life. Looking at these 4 walls and the ceiling. He didn't even know how long his life was going to be, not with the replica serum. He supposed he should be grateful to Tony, because he would've gotten a death sentence, which likely have hurt a hell of a lot, given that most things that killed baseline humans wouldn't kill him (he'd tried, in the months before he surrended himself to the Avengers). And normally no one would be allowed to see him, but Tony's lawyers had managed to wrangled that too. Natasha came in one a week, and Tony usually came at least once a month, despite their previous differences. Bucky sighed, closing his eyes.  
  
_It was supposed to be a milk run. In and out. Neither of them had expected the ambush, or seen it coming. Bucky still blamed himself. Steve was tough with his new body, but even he couldn't survive that many bullets at once. The way Bucky had growled and turned on the shooter was enough to have them fleeing, but not before he had a good look at their face. At Steve's cry, he ran over to him, just as he fell to the ground._  
  
_"Stevie.." Bucky murmured, falling to the ground beside him and guiding his head into his lap. "Stevie look at me, hey, its gonna be okay Stevie." He said._  
  
_"Bucky.." Stevie had said breathlessly. "I dont want to die yet."_  
  
_Bucky's eyes filled with tears. "You're not gonna die Stevie. Til the end of the line remember?"_  
  
_"Buck... It hurts."_  
  
_"I know Stevie, but its gonna be okay. God.. Im so sorry."_  
  
_"Its not your fault Buck.. You didn't know. Its okay. I love you so much Bucky." Steve said, crying now._  
  
_"I love you too Stevie, so much." Bucky said, clutching him close. "Its gonna be okay."_  
  
_He repeated it like a mantra, even after Steve pressed a kiss to his lips and his eyes fluttered shut, breathing his last breath._  
  
_Bucky was sobbing, clutching Steve's body when the others had arrived. They took Steve's body onto the Quinjet and Bucky was unstoppable that day, avenging Steve's death with an anger more lethal than the Winter Soldier's._  
  
Bucky choked back a sob as he remembered that day and the days that followed.  
  
_Bucky was in a haze for months after that. When he came out of his rage he just felt numb. Steve was gone. He watched them lower his body into the ground, sobbed into Natasha's shoulder._  
  
_He was like a zombie. He barely slept, and when he did, he woke up screaming Steve's name, reaching for the empty space in the bed beside him. He wouldn't eat, and it was only Bruce and Sam's force feeding and the serum that meant he didn't starve._  
  
_When he woke from the haze it was because Tony shoved a file in his face. The reason Steve was dead. The plot to kill Captain America. Only one part of it._  
  
_After that it was his mission to avenge Steve properly, by murdering every single person that played a role in his death._  
  
It probably hadnt been Tony's intention for him to murder all those people when he gave him the partial file, and he didnt blame the man for his current situation. Everyone he blamed were 6 feet under and rotting by name.  
  
_Over the months following he was almost as emotionless as he'd been under HYDRAs control. He worked his work up the food chain, slaughtering everyone who had been complacent in Steve's death._  
  
_When he'd found out who the higher ups were that had ordered it in the first place he saw red. People that Steve had trusted. Had smiled to his face and then signed his death warrant._  
  
_He'd murdered the President of the United States without second thought, along with around 5-7 senators and members of parliament. How could he care about their deaths when they had helped murder his Stevie?_  
  
_The United Nations leaders were a little more difficult, but he still didnt care about their deaths._  
  
Even though they had landed him in his current situation, he didnt regret his actions. He just regretted getting caught. He'd do it all again in a heartbeat for his Stevie.

But even those drastic measures hadn't brought back the love of his life. He was still half a person without him, living a worthless existence.  
  
Steve had made him want to be better, but with him gone, it didn't matter anymore.  
  
Nothing mattered anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> Basically Bucky murdered a heap of Important Government People because they helped order Steve's death. 
> 
> I literally wrote this on the way home from work at 12am so its probably shit but Ive had this idea for awhile so.


End file.
